Russell Brand’s The Messiah Complex

As someone who has been in a media coma for months and no longer watches television, reads the magazines at the check out line of the grocery store nor pays attention to the “news” of the world, I recently was referred to watch Russell Brand’s Messiah Complex tour.  It was brought to my attention by someone who I trust and know shares the same hopes for the raising of the planet’s consciousness so we may, as humans, be led to make the world a better place.

I honestly had no idea what his new tour was about, no idea what I was about to see nor why my friend thought I should see it.  It was truly amazing and has had a lasting effect on me.  I highly recommend that people check it out and can find the show in its entirety on Youtube.  

I didn’t know a whole lot about Brand and still don’t.  I honestly was never a fan of his work and the little I saw of him, I wasn’t really excited about.  However, after watching this show, which to me was absolutely brilliant, I have become absolutely fascinated with his transformation.  

It leads me to be compelled to discuss the question that I believe most people must be asking, what is happening with Russell Brand?

What I see is the raising of awareness, consciousness and an awakening of the spirit right before the public’s eyes.  Watching the transformation of a young person so desperately seeking fame for fulfillment, following the lie told to us from the time we are born in our current culture that money, fame and admiration equals happiness, to a drug addict/alcoholic who found a solution not only to stop using, but to awaken to the truth about his life and the interconnectedness of the lives of every human being on the planet, can only be described as miraculous.

This excites me to watch because I have now found myself yet again on the same spiritual journey.  As much as I have my own opinions on fame and those who relish in it, it seems to be for Brand and for the rest of us, the perfect venue to speak out and gain the much needed attention of the world as to how what the problem is and how we may go about creating lasting change.  

I have been aware for quite some time about the sickness that pervades our global population and all of it’s symptoms, yet had no answers as to what the solution to all of this pain and suffering would be… until now.

What I believe Brand is getting at is that the change must come from us first.  Until we realize that we are all the same, spiritual beings on a human journey, until we realize that we can tap into a power that carries us towards the light that can overcome the dark and give us wisdom aiding in learning to think bigger, beyond the power of what we now perceive as reality, the effort for change is futile.  We can only move towards a solution by raising the consciousness of ourselves first and then give it away to help raise another one person at time.  There was a time when I just didn’t know.  We don’t know until we know.  Then we can start helping in sharing not only the severity of the problem, but one by one we can share in the solution.

After watching The Messiah Complex, I was enthralled to watch an amazing interview he appeared in, A Brand New Politics with Mehdi Hasan, delving deeper into his message, which included questions by the audience asked of Brand as to what kind of actions he proposes to create change.  I highly recommend if you enjoy The Messiah Complex that you check out this interview as well.  

I used to believe that change would happen by addressing the policies and systems that control and enslave us, and to some degree that can be true, but the solution is bigger than that.  It has to start with God.  The good news that the God that lives in each one of us and has a purpose for us all, is bigger than the people, money and global systems that keep the public distracted with the physical world.

It’s awakenings like Brand’s and the work he is doing to share the message of hope and solution that create a ripple effect across the globe that touch each and every one of us who witness it.  In the same way, my awakening and compulsion to write on this topic today to share it with you, will hopefully create another ripple to start and reach all of you.  When you pass it on to others, and on and on it goes, there is no limit to the power of change.  

It starts within each one of us.  Today.

Awakening of My Spirit

If there is a hell on earth, I lived in it before becoming sober about 85 days ago.  I believe that though my body was living in the physical here on earth, mostly locked in my bathroom or in my car which is so strange to think about now because I had a nice home.  My spirit literally was living in the darkness that I relate to be similar to hell.   I had believed the world and all it’s humans had wronged me, wronged the human race and had made a decision that all I needed or wanted in my life was myself and my alcohol and drugs.  I was broken by the events that took place during this last year or so of my life.

As alone as I felt, I only created more of what was killing me by pushing everyone away.  When I say I lived in darkness, I mean I was emerged in the problems.  I took on the world and all of it’s suffering, all of its corruption, all of the sickness and lived in the belief that there was no hope for anyone especially not me.

Near the end of my old life, I had no one.  I spoke to people when I absolutely had to but it very seldom.  I remember sitting in my house, with all lights off in complete darkness, totally alone, frozen with fear and wishing for death.  I wasn’t ever afraid of dying, I was afraid of living.

Looking back, I know there was a part of me that knew that I was always meant for more.  I knew I was meant to be or do something, that there was something more out there that I didn’t have the power to perceive from the point I was at then but the frustration and pain of not being able to “get there” was just destroying my soul.  I couldn’t live in the place I was living, around the people and the problems I had place myself with and not quiet my mind or body with drugs.  It was just too much.

I thank God every day for the pain I lived in then because it brought me to what I have been seeking my whole life.  What I have been searching to live in is the light.  It was not me or my decisions that brought me to the beautiful life I have today.  It was most certainly a power that cannot be seen.

The more I elevate my consciousness, the more I follow the God within in me, the more the world changes around me.  The more I turn my focus within and work on being the change I want to see in people and the world, the more full my soul becomes.  The old situations and people just seem to fall off around me.  My world is becoming limitless and amazingly wonderful.  Things that happen every single day in my life, could be called coincidence, however I see them to be nothing else to me but God carrying and providing for me.  I don’t even need to vocalize what I feel I need in my life.  I just think of it, small things to big things and they just happen.

I get what I need everyday.  I just follow the directions that I know  have worked for others and have been set down for people like me to guide me to have a spiritual awakening.  Amazingly enough, it works.  It really works.

Why Would An Alcoholic/Addict Seek God?

I recently heard someone quote Mark Twain with “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.”

I’ve found that only through complete and utter emotional destruction and devastation have I felt the desire from within to seek God and what my true destiny on this planet was meant to be. It has to be more than just abstinence from all mind altering substances.  I cannot stay stagnant.  I have to keep reaching upwards and growing spiritually for my spirit to survive on this planet.  I choose to use the word God because it’s a shorter, universal term that everyone can recognize and it’s a more simple term when attempting to explain the power that we are unable to recognize with our limited senses, know inside of us is there however the name is less important than the idea. I use God to describe that thing that resides inside of me, you and inside every living being, the thing that connects me to you and everyone else on the planet.

It is tough to explain God but I experience it everyday.

A nurse explained it like this.  She takes care of people in the intensive care unit.  They can be unconscious for weeks at a time, in bed, fighting for their lives.  She is by their side, knows everything about them, cares for their every need and helps to keep them alive.  One night, when a man she had been caring for woke up out of his coma and he jumped at the sight of her.  He had no idea who she was, which seemed strange to her since she had been the one who had been there the whole time, more than his wife or family, during the time he was fighting to stay alive.  She put her hand on his shoulder and said, “Honey, I have been here watching over you and caring for you the whole time.”

That is what it is like for me when I realized I became conscious to God being there and caring for me my whole life but being completely unawake to it all.   Whether I knew it, believed it or denied it, God was always there.  And I have finally been awakened.

When I take one step forward even when I don’t feel like it, getting out of myself and taking action on the intuitive thought of how I can be of help to another human on this earth, working to keep my own will and selfish desires at bay and continue to grow on a spiritual path, I find peace.  My heart is full and I feel unconditional love.  Ironically, I find more peace in following that small still voice inside me and in doing for others than I have ever felt by manipulating and managing my own life to get what I want, which is usually in the physical world.  Those things never fill me up. I always want something new shortly after I get it or I just find myself wanting things that are not meant for me, therefore creating wreckage and causing myself pain.  A spiritual hole will never be filled successfully with anything other than God.

I tried every way imaginable for over 24 years and nothing has ever worked like seeking God.  Since I have honestly sought to improve my spiritual life I have never felt alone, ever.  There is a new power in what I have found.  I never feel like the answer is to resort to cocaine, opiates or alcohol to make me feel better anymore.  For someone like me, who has survived this long in this life only by the aid of these things and has needed drugs like I need air to breath, it’s truly a miracle that I am clean and sober today.  I couldn’t be without them and do what normal people do.  I could’t exist.

82 days ago, I told my family to just let me go.  I said at my intervention, “Just let me die.  It’s all that’s left for me.  I can’t live anymore like this and I can’t live without it.  It would be easier for everyone else.”

Today, my life is amazing and more importantly, I want this life!  A scared, empty, little girl with no where else to run and no desire to fight through life (especially sober) is now living in the Hollywood Hills, in quite possibly the best Sober Living in this country, with amazing experiences everyday, the best recovery that exits, a family of women whom I love with all my heart and love me and hope for the future.

I had nothing to do with it either.  I did not want it.  Never-the-less,  I was carried to and through rehab, carried to Los Angeles in this house that is filled with God and given something to fuel my soul while I find out why I am meant to still be here today, with trying to die more times than I can count.

If not me, then who?  If all the pieces of the puzzle that so intricately paved my road to take me on this journey to now, the situations that had to happen to push me to let go , had nothing to do with me, then who orchestrated it?

The answer to me is clear.  It is God working in my life.

It took loosing everything, absolutely everything in my life, children, material and relationships, to finally free me to find my purpose on this earth. I had to loose all the old to make room for new. I had to literally start with nothing so I could start on a new path. Everyday I stay where that voice inside me, which is God, tells me to stay, the universe opens up to me and it fills my heart so much more than any drink, drug, food or sexual experience has ever done.

Miracles happen all around me and before becoming conscious… I just had been missing them all.