Don’t Forget, It’s Simple

As I have grown and awakened to truth throughout this life’s journey, as much I have learned, what I know about myself today is that I can easily forget everything.

I can shut myself off from God in a second, stop doing what I have been doing that works and then instead of being driven by spirit, I am driven by ego.

I become closed, ego prevents me from hearing truth and the downward spiral occurs.

Instead of standing in the light with my fellows, I end up standing in darkness alone.

The good news is as soon as I become wiling and open to listen, I again remember why I’m here, what my purpose is and what is really important, like being awakened from a bad dream.

There is no past, no future, just now.

I am not this body nor this character in my story.

I’m not here to for the career, the money, the things, the partner, the friends, the kids, the family or any acknowledgement I may seek to gain from these things.

The main thing that remains constant, the truth I always come back to from all this, is that my only job here on the planet is to love and embody love.

It seems too simple to be true.

It is entirely that simple.

But that’s it.

It’s all about love.

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Knowledge and Power

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God grant me knowledge and power.

Help me to quiet my mind and see with my soul.

Allow my knowing to be clear and give me the courage and power to carry out your will.

Help me be loving and tolerant of others.

Please remove my fears.

Help me to forget everything I think I know for a new experience today.

Help me remain humble and teachable.

Help me to be in the moment so that I may experience the beauty and joy that exists all around me.

Help me to always look at the world with childlike wonder.

Keep me from retreating, holding back and being closed off from loving and caring for others.

Help me to be open to what is.

Keep me from being locked in this idea of self and see where I can be of help to those I may reach.

Allow me to release my past and who I think I am so I may grow towards who I am meant to be.

Give me courage to live in and speak truth unattached to the result.

God please just for today, replace my fears and resentments with trust and belief in your will for me.

May thy will and mine be one.

Born Into A New Life

If someone would’ve told me eight months ago that I would be living in another city, sober from any mind altering substances, awakened, with a new amazing job caring for a house full of girls that are like family, the same house that saved my life and be looking at a future full of hope, I would’ve called them crazy.

I expected to be six feet under the earth. I wanted to die. I prayed for death to come take me.

But death would not come for me as much as I invited it.

Instead I was lifted out of hell by a God that had different plans for me. Although I did not choose it, I was awakened.  I didn’t know how I knew but it was clear to me early on in my sobriety that I had a job to do on this planet.

And I was willing.

Willingness turned into determination. The more I seek answers, to understand the truth, the more it becomes clear where my place is in this world and what I must do.

Serve God first, help others awaken and then everything else.

It’s no longer about me and what I want.

I now get that every second of my existence on earth so far had to happen, in the exact way it happened, to prepare me for this next part of my journey. All of the darkness has been necessary because without it I wouldn’t have sought out the light.

There is always more work to be done, if my soul is to evolve. The work that needs to be done can only be done within. It’s a gift to be able to be present for this experience, so I can see the things that still block me from God, myself and others.

I can be present for the lessons.

By putting first thing first, my life has opened up and amazing things are happening.

I can’t wait to see what comes next. But one thing I know for sure is that whatever it is, I will be right here and right now to experience it.

And for that I am thankful.

Love

All I needed was permission to just love

It came from the one person in this world that speaks truth to me
And I hear it
She said to just give love
No matter what the result
Without conditions or expectations
To love them even when they may not be where I am at
That what I’d been looking for was already all inside of me
That it’s in the giving of love freely
Without judgement
Without care of what anyone else thinks about it
Even if the person I’m giving it to doesn’t feel the same
Even if they don’t have the love to give like I do
It doesn’t matter
Because it’s in the giving love to others that I feel whole
I love because that it what I am here to do
Because love is what I am
Because pure love is what God is
I get closer to God the more I love
Together or not together
With you or without you
I love you with all of me

And to me that is all that matters

Seeing through the soul

My eyes have been opened to the truth

But this sight is not through my eyes

It is through my soul that I truly see

I will never understand why it happened now

Why it happened to me

Not before nor after this moment in time

I only know that I have woke from a dream

The dream I thought was real until now

A light switch flicked on

Bright and burning for the whole world to see

No longer am I separate, different and alone

God is in me

I just was not awake to this fact

If I walked the earth with no person by my side

For the rest of whatever human life I have left

This temporary journey

I would never be alone

I have everything I need already within me

I always have but have failed to see

That this power of ultimate and unconditional love

Has already shown to itself to be

Working miracles big and small

This way it has always been

Only if I pay attention to not miss them

I am aware of the beauty of what lies around me

In each spirit that roams this lifetime

I finally know the potential for what is to come

In all things

And for this reason I carry the flame of hope

 

 

Blaming

 

Playing the victim hurts no one but myself. For so long I lived life blaming others for my troubles. Anger and resentment kept me spiritually sick and pretty miserable.

It blocks me from others and God.

When blocked from God, what keeps me from relapse?

As an alcoholic, I can’t afford to stay in anger and resentment.

I most always have had a part in my past problems. Whether it be the situations I placed myself in, my own actions, the people I brought into my life and the kind of choices I made, if I honestly look at myself I will find that I brought on this misery.

To cover up my own part, I get angry at others.

Not only can I find freedom from finding my part and letting go of anger but I grow spiritually and make better decisions, have better relationships and find more happiness.

By not playing the victim, I start creating my own destiny.

I am destined to repeat history if I don’t learn from it.

Forgiveness is not for others, it is for my own inner peace.

Today I will look at my part, learn from the past and forgive.

I will be free.

All Things Starting With God

Everything that I have gained on this new part of my spiritual journey has been a result of my relationship with God.

My primary relationship has to be with God and from the solid existence of that, all other relationships flourish.

Everything in my life is effortless when I cultivate a conscious contact with God.

I can trust in the fact that everything that happens in the world around me is necessary and all I have to do is follow my truth and just be in the present.

I can listen to that voice inside me and follow it walking through any fear, knowing that no matter what I will get exactly what I need, I will be exactly where I am supposed to be and I will be completely taken care of.

I can be vulnerable.

I can say what I need to say.

I can allow others to love me.

I can give unconditional love to others.

I don’t have to play a character to try to keep myself “safe”.

I can be okay in the world with out “needing” anything.

When I stay in God’s will for me instead of my own, everything works out so much better.