There Are No Victims

The second biggest lie you keep telling yourself is that you are a victim.

No one did anything to you.

You have masterfully created everything in your life.

You created all the pain.

You created the loss.

It’s all because of the first lie you tell yourself.

The lie that has caused your whole story and created all the characters in it.

The lie that has removed all the good that has ever entered your world.

That lie is that you are are not deserving of unconditional love.

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Wide Open

My heart is wide open, flowing, like silk curtains blowing in the breeze through a patio door in the summer time.

I feel so much that it fills me up and shines through every cell of my body.

This life is full of wondrous beauty in moments of perfection when I know I am alive and I know exactly what being alive means.

The song of birds chirping in the trees, wind on my face, caressing my arms, as the sun kisses every thing it touches, this is when with feet planted firmly on the ground, I am one with consciousness.

This is connection.

Breaking The Cycle

Taking an honest look at my past is valuable because it can be used as my doorway to freedom.

I say this because unless I know where I came from and what those experiences taught me about the world I live in, I won’t be able to see how and why I keep recreating it over and over today.

The continual unconscious drive to keep living out the same insanity keeps me in bondage.

Unless and until I become awake to the patterns of my actions and the underlying beliefs behind them, I am unable to make new choices and do something different for a different result.

As a survivor of molestation by someone who was supposed to be my protector, I have continued out that cycle by the choices I have made in my intimate life.

What seemed “normal” to me was that the person who was supposed to protect me was actually my abuser, like a kidnapped victim falling for their kidnapper.

I couldn’t see what was actually happening.

I didn’t understand why this was happening over and over again.

I didn’t know that I was the one who was creating it now.

I have become to see this play out in my life today and now can recognise it much quicker and finally have the awareness to make new choices and take different actions that lead me towards a better existence.

More consciousness develops from this inside work.

I get closer and closer to the life I want.

That is what I call freedom.

Journey To The Truth About Love

My journey of finding out the truth about love has been life changing.

I guess I knew little about the how and the why of it because I picked up all these false beliefs along the way from the world we live in about what love looks like.

I had love categorized into the intimacy kind of love, family love and friendship love.

Forget acquaintances or strangers, I didn’t understand that I could love them as well, that everyone was deserving of love for free just because they existed.

Because our true nature is love, it’s something we inherently already are.

Maybe love is not something to understand is it just something to be.

A flower does not think about how to bloom, nor understand why, it just blooms.

When I speak of how I love others now, independent of who they are or what they do, I can see the looks on those who do not understand as I at one time did not.

Love is not something to possess or to be deserved.

Love is not something that exists to be dependant on how you make me feel, what you give to me, how you affect me nor has anything at all to do with me.

It just is all on it’s own.

The only kind of real love that exists is unconditional love.

Why Do Some Get And Stay Sober?

No two human experiences are ever the same. There can similarities but really everyone has their own journey maybe only understood by the one having it.

As far as drug addicts and alcoholics, the mystery is how some people get sober young, some old or some never.

Some people get sober and stay sober for their entire life and some get sober and relapse, get sober and relapse.

I can’t even fully answer the question of my own journey. I often wonder what it was about me that just couldn’t get it and keep it.

Even though it has been my path I don’t regret any of it.

I try not to spend too much time “figuring it out”.

Trying to “figure it out” never helped me before.

Staying present is my biggest tool for peace in my life.

What matters to me most now is what I’ve done this far to have a new and different experience with the 12 steps and with life.

I see more now than ever before.

I am more conscious than ever before.

I have more courage, faith, belief, trust, awareness, calm, peace, joy, freedom and hope than ever before.

That is what is important to me today.