Insanity

It’s hard not to get swallowed up by the insanity of it all.

When life gets crazy and people get crazy, I just need to stayed firmly grounded in my center. Fear pervades these humans around me and I see all the damage it creates. Fear creates all harm on this planet. It’s the root of it all, which I equate with the darkness.

People hurt other people with the things they do and say. Respect and kindness gets lost. Anxiety increases and ripples through everyone involved. Anger and frustration rise.

Blame gets thrown in all the wrong places, though there never is a “right place” to throw it.

All I can ever do is rest in the fact that I am true to myself, that I do the best I can, that I respect those around me, and I do the right thing. I am unwilling to let the chaos suck me in. I refuse to take on the fear that others try to pass on.

I stay in love and in peace knowing that people will be okay, even when going through emotionally hard times. I always ended up okay, and so will everyone else.

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Staying Out Of The Dream

I want to live in the story that I wish to create, not someone else’s. What I mean by that a reality based on a set of belief systems drummed up by the majority of humans or specific individuals. To create a world that I can live in, that’s what is essential to my sanity and my happiness.

Every day the stories told by people about what they believe is real and stories of the world going on around me constantly attempt to pull me in. It takes daily vigilance to not get lost in the fog of it all, and come back to what I know to be real, what I know to be true.

I constantly weave in and out of clarity, going into the dream and then coming back out. Forgetting and relearning, over and over again.

In those moments, when I see everything exactly as it is, it’s like a deep breath of fresh air after holding my breath under water.

I can see people acting out their incessant patterns of insanity, and without judgement, love them and let them go to be free to live their lives as they do. I can understand them only from a deep understanding of myself when I did those things and didn’t know why. I never even thought to ask why, I just did them unconsciously.

I thought I was looking for love when I really I was looking for someone to complete me, someone to fill the void that existed while on my own, someone to hold me up, someone to fix the unhappiness.

To hold onto this awareness and not repeat old patterns, there is one important focus that remains and that is to not get drawn into the dream with others, to stay firmly planted in my reality.

When I watch people search and search for completeness in the arms of another, I am reminded of why that is not the answer for me. When I see those around me looking to fill their spiritual emptiness with someone else, someone who will never be the solution, I say to myself “Thank you God for freeing me off this need to find comfort in a person, the comfort that will only ever be found by remaining close to you.”

Leaf in the wind

I used to feel like a leaf that had come off the branch of a tree, blowing in the wind.

The wind was the world going on around me and my actions, attitudes and happiness were always dependent on the weather and the direction of the breeze.

Now I’m the roots of the tree planted firmly in the ground, the trunk, the branches and the leaves.

I’m the whole tree, glistening in the sun, standing strong through rain, wind and storm.

I am connected to everything.

Love

All I needed was permission to just love

It came from the one person in this world that speaks truth to me
And I hear it
She said to just give love
No matter what the result
Without conditions or expectations
To love them even when they may not be where I am at
That what I’d been looking for was already all inside of me
That it’s in the giving of love freely
Without judgement
Without care of what anyone else thinks about it
Even if the person I’m giving it to doesn’t feel the same
Even if they don’t have the love to give like I do
It doesn’t matter
Because it’s in the giving love to others that I feel whole
I love because that it what I am here to do
Because love is what I am
Because pure love is what God is
I get closer to God the more I love
Together or not together
With you or without you
I love you with all of me

And to me that is all that matters