The universe always has answers all around me, all the time, to all my questions if I just open my eyes to them.
It’s like these flashing signs screaming for my attention.
When my ego is loud and I’m caught up in expectations, resistance, and personal desires, I can’t see what’s right in front of me.
The more I try to “figure things out” with thinking, the less chance I have to be connected to the answers within.
The answers will not come from my thinking.
Times of quiet meditation, just slowing down altogether and being present, is necessary for knowing which direction to go and what path to take.
In times of indecision, although it’s taken practice and I’m never perfect, I have made progress on not reacting but just waiting until I’m sure of what action to take.
When answers become clear that’s when I need courage.
Courage enables me to step out from fear and into faith and trust, that God has my back no matter what, and I then I can follow what I know to be true.
I feel the power flow through me from a strengthened connection with God when I do this and feel the presence of God all around me.
I feel safe.
The existence that is real is not what is seen with the eyes, heard with the ears or felt with touch, but known in the sacred space of the heart.
There is nothing more powerful than love.
Nothing more powerful than truth.
Nothing more powerful than God.
What else on the planet can penetrate the thickest walls?
Brighten the darkest corners?
Fill up empty hearts?
Envelop a room, completely unseen, yet felt with an overwhelming warmth?
Make the pain of years melt away?
Bring us to spill tears of joy?
Instantly remove fear?
Gain trust in an instant?
Unify us all?
God help me forgive the man who stole my phone today.
A phone I had for less than a month, after losing my last one to a wave at the ocean.
He doesn’t see that by harming another he is really harming himself.
Help me let go of the anger, frustration and sadness felt from the senseless act at the hands of another.
It’s just a phone, contact numbers, pictures and writings.
It just happened a few weeks ago and I dealt with it then.
I can do it again.
It’s not really about the stolen phone though.
It triggered things much deeper, like these surface things always do.
It was just the wind that blew down my house of cards.
Help me let go of the violation I feel by this latest loss.
Thank you for helping me not stay a victim but have another experience of taking my power back.
Help me to accept this and learn what I must learn from this experience and not loose faith in human beings.
Thank you for keeping me in the light and allowing me the willingness to not stay in the darkness.
I cannot do this on my own.
I need your help.
Be with me.
Keep me safe.
I trust in your will.
God grant me knowledge and power.
Help me to quiet my mind and see with my soul.
Allow my knowing to be clear and give me the courage and power to carry out your will.
Help me be loving and tolerant of others.
Please remove my fears.
Help me to forget everything I think I know for a new experience today.
Help me remain humble and teachable.
Help me to be in the moment so that I may experience the beauty and joy that exists all around me.
Help me to always look at the world with childlike wonder.
Keep me from retreating, holding back and being closed off from loving and caring for others.
Help me to be open to what is.
Keep me from being locked in this idea of self and see where I can be of help to those I may reach.
Allow me to release my past and who I think I am so I may grow towards who I am meant to be.
Give me courage to live in and speak truth unattached to the result.
God please just for today, replace my fears and resentments with trust and belief in your will for me.
May thy will and mine be one.
The problem that causes all of my “problems” in this human experience lies not in truth but in my perception of my day.
My reality is based in the story I tell myself. My feelings follow from whatever story I am telling myself.
Most always, nothing changes in my day. Truth does not change. It’s the story I start telling myself from my thoughts that cause me to feel a certain way.
It comes from my judgement of events.
That judgement comes from belief systems not based in truth.
I can start to tell myself a new story.
I can tell myself any story I wish and then my feelings can change around what I see is happening.
I can tell myself wonderful stories, stories of gratitude, and create a wonderful existence.
I have the power to control my feelings.
I can tell myself that every moment in my present life is bringing me to something greater.
It lies in the connection of mind, body and spirit.
Guided by spirit, I can change what my mind thinks, my “feelings” and the reaction of my body to my thinking mind.
Being constantly aware of the story I tell myself takes practice.
If I let God in I have the power to change it all, to change my entire reality.
The longest period of sobriety I had before I relapsed yet again, was a gift. I believe it gave me a taste of what life could be like in Alcoholics Anonymous, abstaining from mind altering substances and a glimpse of the existence of God.
Just believing that God existed was not enough, for me. I couldn’t completely surrender to a God I didn’t trust. Therefore I still felt that I had to control life and people around me to feel okay.
I had heard people say that God is love, but I didn’t believe it.
I heard people say that I could find the voice of God inside of me, but I didn’t believe it.
Without realizing it, I made people my higher power. I was always asking my sponsor what to do when I had a crisis. She would tell me what to do. Sometimes I did it, sometimes I didn’t.
What happened was when I didn’t follow her “advice” I felt guilt and shame and started hiding things from her. Without building a conscious contact with God to find the answer within myself, I would ask other people what they thought and pick and choose who else’s advice I might listen to.
This was very confusing.
I never stopped to think that if I knew nothing of how God worked because I was not God, how would anyone else know? How could a human tell me what I should do when they weren’t God either?
Now sober again, the direction I have been given is purely towards a spiritual solution and the steps to get closer to God. The things that are suggested I do by my sponsor are to work the steps to find answers within myself.
This has given me a new way of life. I have a new power to navigate through life. I am not dependent on others to find my way. I can hear my fellow humans in a different way, listening for God in what they say instead of feeling pressured to do what others think I should do.
I know that no matter how much I understand what the voice inside of me says, which is my intuition, or how strong my knowing is for myself, I can’t pretend to know what it would say for other people. So how could I ever carry judgement or tell anyone else what they should do?
I know I needed every second of my past, especially the pain, to get me to today. I needed a bottom and a surrender.
I am forever grateful for the program of Alcoholics Anonymous.
It brought me to God and gave me a new life.